Friday, January 14, 2011

Say what?

As some words are vanishing (or being banished or being threatened to be banished), new words are being created to fill their void. Some are more useful (and meaningful) than others, but all are welcome to the English language. Or are they?

Below is an apology written by Ricky Romance after threatening to shoot Chris Brown:

I would like to extend my most sincere apologies to the elderly and youth of our nation for my sudden acrasial message of violence towards other individuals of unimportance. 
I must eclaircise any misunderstandings that I am a Man of irrational aggression and behavior.
In no way am I attempting to justify my actions towards persons of high immaturity levels and hypocritical methods of "becoming a better person," I was wrong. 
My unexpected reaction to fallaciloquences embellished with deceitful humgruffin cover-ups and unnecessary remarks towards my younger brother enraged me. 
I couldn't seem to fathom how a immature nanocephalous adult raglan tailored ex-batman and a jean maillot wearing macrotus, labrose, kazachoc like dancing, woman beater callent could make such comments and pass judgment to an abuse victim.
At the moment I was infuriated. Please let my actions be as a lesson as what not to do. You must vastate yourself to aggression and search for other solutions before reacting.
Threatening closet coward human beings only leads their tearful plea for restraining orders, desperate cries for help from "affiliating gang bangers", and countless whiney excuses -I.E. "she hit me first!!" to the media and courts, which could possibly result unwanted circumstances.
As for the once semi high powered homosexual perverts, molesters and child rapists of the Industry, I vaticinate justice will be brought to you on Judgment Day.
I leave this to God though. Please except my apology, obviously knowing the message can always be heard if ears are around . Thank you.
- Ricky Romance

The letter is reprinted on the SPOGG Blog, which is where I first read about it. My mind is still reeling as I try to figure out all the words perniciously thrown around. In fact, all I can think right now is, "Is he for real?" Oh, that and, "It's accept, not except!"

Your Fellow Humgruffin in Linguistics

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